Thursday, April 22, 2010

Temptation Island

Yesterday was full of temptations for me. It really was the first day that I had to face a lot of temptation for an extended period of time. We had a work function where lunch was provided. I brought a back-up lunch just in case and was really glad that I did because the provided lunch happened to be sloppy joes. I didn’t know the nutritional info, and since I also happen to not be particularly fond of sloppy joes, it was pretty easy for me to pass up and I had the soup that I brought instead. To round out my lunch, I had some baked Cheetos and some veggies.

Then the cake came out. I’m not going to lie to you – it looked fucking good. The woman next to me had a piece and I could smell the heavenly chocolaty frosting. But, I stayed away from the dessert table all together and had one mini Three Musketeers instead. I think those minis are like a half of a normal bite, but I stretched it into three bites.

After work, I went to the gym and did 15 minutes on the elliptical and 30 just walking on the treadmill. I was actually just under my calories yesterday, and I was definitely feeling wiped out when I was on the elliptical.

Every month, my husband and I have a get together with some friends at a bar downtown. Usually we have dinner there and a couple of pints of beer, but last night I ate before I left to meet them and while I was there just had one glass of wine. And that was tough. I was seeing people getting plates of fries and big soft pretzels and pint after pint of beer. The smell of it all was really hard for me, but I resisted.

I feel like I should have been ecstatic about my willpower yesterday, but honestly, I am so used to cheating and feeling guilty about it the next day, it’s like my brain doesn’t really believe that I didn’t actually splurge on anything. I’ve had to kind of remind myself that I didn’t have that piece of cake, even though I imagined vividly what it would be like if I had.

This weekend, husband and I are going to run in a 5k and then meet a friend for her birthday dinner. That will be my “free” meal for the week and I feel like I’ll really deserve it after making sacrifices yesterday. It’s kind of nice to have a free meal to look forward to. And it helps me discern what temptations are “worth” straying from my goals.

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